Even A Dog Can Shake Hands Lyrics

Well, he's trying to survive up on Mulholland Drive
He's got the phone in the car in his hand
Everybody's trying to be a friend of mine
Even a dog can shake hands

He wants twenty per cent 'cause he knew you back when
Now they all want a piece of the band
Everybody's trying to be a friend of mine
Even a dog can shake hands

All the worms and the gnomes are having lunch at Le Dome
They're all living off the fat of the land
Everybody's trying to be a friend of mine
Even a dog can shake hands

Sign Page 42
We'll do the rest for you
Find a way to make it pay
Don't lose your head
You'll end up dead
Or you'll be living in the Valley someday

Abandon all hope and don't rock the boat
And we'll all make a few hundred grand
Everybody's trying to be a friend of mine
Even a dog can shake hands

You'll be making the scene 'til they pick your bones clean
No, they don't leave much for the fans
Everybody's trying to be a friend of mine
Even a dog can shake hands

Sign Page 42
We'll do the rest for you
Find a way to make it pay
Don't lose your head
You'll end up dead
Or you'll be living in the Valley someday


Action - Movie Violence

Senator: Mr. Dragon, you have a young daughter, do you not?
Peter Dragon: Let's not go there...
Senator: Her name is Georgia, she's about 10 years old I believe.
Peter Dragon: Don't do this.
Senator: Has little Georgia seen your film entitled "Ripcord"?
Peter Dragon: She can't get in Senator, it's rated R.
Senator: Which contains 357 acts of violence, 175 profanities, and four scenes of lesbian sex. She proud of her daddy for that one?
Wendy Ward: I think we should just go.
Senator: How can you look that sweet little girl in the eye?
Peter Dragon: I manage. I never voted to subsidize the growing of tobacco, while turning my back on food programs for starving kids. I've never vetoed a gun control bill; all MY guns are fake, Senator. I've never rushed to the defense of Kuwaiti oil fields, while ignoring genocide in Africa, because big oil companies that line your fat pockets aren't concerned with black Africa. Those are all productions of YOUR company Senator, this company right here!
Senator Powell: Now you are perilously close to being cited for contempt, Mister Dragon!
Peter Dragon: I'm already in contempt! I'm in contempt of all you old whores and hypocrites! At least I'm giving the American people what they want!
Senator Powell: And just exactly what is it that you think they want?
Peter Dragon: I'll tell "yew" exactly what they want, Senator: they want chase scenes and car crashes! They want firm breasts and tight-assed Latino men! They want their cowboys to be strong and silent. They want their cops to bend the rules to get the job done. They want the boy to get the girl. They want the alien to be killed... unless he's cute. They want the good guy to win. They want the bad guy to die, hopefully in the biggest explosion the budget will allow. But most importantly, Senator, they want to walk into a theater and for ninety minutes be able to forget about the fucking mess you have left of this nation.

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The Funeral - Band of Horses

I'm coming up only to hold you under
I'm coming up only to show you wrong
And to know you is hard and we wonder
To know you all wrong, we were

Really too late to call, so we wait for
Morning to wake you; it's all we got
To know me as hardly golden
Is to know me all wrong, they were

At every occasion I'll be ready for a funeral
At every occasion once more is called a funeral
Every occasion I'm ready for the funeral
At every occasion one brilliant day funeral

I'm coming up only to show you down for
I'm coming up only to show you wrong
To the outside, the dead leaves, they all blow (alive is very poetic)
For'e (before) they died had trees to hang their hope

At every occasion I'll be ready for the funeral
At every occasion once more is called the funeral
At every occasion I'm ready for the funeral
At every occasion one brilliant day funeral



Seven Arts Post Article from T-P

Post-production studio under construction in Esplanade mansion

by Kate Moran, The Times-Picayune
Sunday April 26, 2009, 1:00 AM

The house at Esplanade Avenue and Bourbon Street was built in 1859 for a ship captain and in more recent times was owned by Leon Impastato, a landlord with extensive holdings in the Quarter. The movie-related investment group purchased the house for $1.7 million and is turning it into a state-of-the-art post-production studio and residence.

A crumbling, gothic mansion on Esplanade Avenue that served as a setting for several films is about to become a post-production space that should help grow the movie-making industry in Louisiana.

A group of investors bought the house in 2007 and has begun renovating the neglected interior to include sound studios, editing rooms and a space to screen films, as well as apartments where directors, editors and technicians can stay as they shepherd movies through their final stages of production.

While filmmakers have descended on Louisiana in recent years, drawn both by its lush, tumbledown charm and by the lucrative film tax credits the state launched in 2002, they tend to stay only for the time it takes to shoot their footage. Then it is home to California, where editors begin the painstaking job of culling scenes and layering in sound.

The partners behind the studio-cum-residence at 807 Esplanade hope to keep more films in town during the post-production stage, an effort that should bring high-tech, high-paying jobs to New Orleans. They plan to cater to small and independent films, hosting perhaps two crews at a time inside the converted house.

"We want to essentially trap the business and double the amount of time they spend here," said Michael Arata, a principal in Voodoo Productions, a partial owner of the project. "Post-production can amount to 25 to 30 percent of a film's cost, and that has left Louisiana."

The house Arata and company chose sits on the edge of the French Quarter, at Esplanade and Bourbon Street, and offers an expansive view of the downtown skyline from the third floor. A rusted balcony runs along the side of the house, allowing guests to peer down at the courtyard that until recently was festooned with thick tropical overgrowth.

The house was built in 1859 for the ship captain William Whann and was owned in more recent times by Leon Impastato, a landlord with extensive holdings in the French Quarter. It had been carved up into tiny, tenement-like apartments, but the current owners have largely gutted the interior, taking care to preserve marble fireplaces and other historic elements.

"This place got tremendous hard, hard use," Arata said.

Elaborate cornices and ceiling medallions have survived inside the front parlor, a room Arata said would hold a large screen that filmmakers could use to view a day's edits or host a local premiere. The parlor's murals are preserved behind a silken fabric draped over the walls during the filming of the recent Brad Pitt movie "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button."

Other rooms in the house will be made distinctly modern, including a third-floor mixing room that will be sealed with a rubber floor to keep ambient noise out. The house will also have Foley stages, where technicians can manufacture sounds such as footsteps or the clattering of hooves.

Arata, an actor and film producer, is pursuing the venture with Jerry Daigle, an attorney and fellow principal in Voodoo Productions. They are collaborating with Peter and Susan Hoffman, the founders of Seven Arts Productions, an independent producer and distributor that brings a roster of well-known clients to the effort. Advantage Capital Partners, a venture capital firm that has been a longtime supporter of the movie industry in New Orleans, also has joined as an investor.

The partnership received historic, new market and film infrastructure tax credits to birth the venture, which will be called Seven Arts Post. Arata did not disclose the total value of the project, but he said the group purchased the house on Esplanade for $1.7 million.

At least a handful of post-production spaces already exist in Louisiana, including Digital FX in Baton Rouge and Storyville and Swelltone Labs, both in New Orleans. Seven Arts is unique in offering small apartments, complete with individual kitchens and bathrooms, where directors, editors and others can stay with their families for several weeks or even months.

Arata said editors often pare down a film from a sterile cubicle in Hollywood. The opening of the space at 807 Esplanade will allow those editors to soak up the same lush atmosphere as the actors and director do, an advantage Arata believes could influence the ultimate shape of a film.

"The way the project was envisioned was as a unique opportunity for people to live and work in the same place," Daigle said. "The editor could come down and begin working as the film is progessing to see the material and how it is being put together, which would enhance his ability to improve the project and make sure everything is consistent and looks good."

Louisiana implemented a tax credit for film production in 2002, and since then state residents have earned a total of $250 million in wages from the movie-making business. Chris Stelly, the director of film and television at the state's Office of Entertainment Industry Development, said some of the jobs that will be created at Seven Arts Post will be permanent positions, not the transient sort that disappears once the shooting of a film concludes.

While the group behind Seven Arts Post hopes to attract filmmakers shooting in New Orleans, it also hopes to perform editing, sound, color correction and other post-production work for directors who film in locations beyond New Orleans. Those jobs would be relatively stable and permanent.

"The more we as a state are able to offer from pre- to post-production, the better able we will be to grow an indigenous industry," Stelly said. "We're really pleased that our infrastructure in Louisiana continues to grow and mature, helping lay the cornerstone for permanent jobs in the entertainment industry."

Kate Moran can be reached at kmoran@timespicayune.com or 504.826.3491.

A view of the New Orleans skyline is visible from a third-floor balcony of the French Quarter home at 807 Esplanade Ave., which investors bought in 2007 to transform its neglected interior into a state-of-the-art film studio complete with enough room to house working film crews for lengthy periods.

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Van Meegren - Forger

I love a good con:

Fool the Art World
Launching his career in the 1920s and 30s, Dutch painter Han van Meegeren utterly failed to take critics by storm. Apparently committed to toiling on realistic portraiture while everybody else was trying to be Picasso, van Meegeren seemed doomed to the fate of a "never was." But when a critic derided his work as "lacking originality," the frustrated artist hatched a plan that would prove his talent and make his foes look like idiots. Ironically, the plan involved abandoning any pretense at originality whatsoever. Instead, van Meegeren set out to become the greatest art forger who ever lived; not merely copying known works of his hero, Jan Vermeer, but producing new paintings that would combine Vermeer's literal and artistic signatures with van Meegeren's own critically panned style of painting. Van Meegeren originally planned to create just one of these paintings, make it an international sensation and then reveal the truth to a very small and sorry art world. But plans--as plans are wont to do--went awry.



Diamonds Beginning

This would be the beginning of Diamonds. Referencing Gold. Sequel to Twenties. Enjoy:

The Mic
So where are the rest.

The Indian
I am it. All that is left.

The Mic
So what happened? There were four of you. Not inthe best condition, but not that bad off.

The Indian
What do you think happened? You think we went down there and suddenly changed personalities? We were still who we were when we left.

The Mic
You had money.

The Indian
That we did. But there is always the chance for more.

The Mic
So more money?

The Indian
Gold actually.

The Mic
Very nice. So you got the gold?

The Indian
Well, we weren't the only ones who wanted it.

The Mic

The Indian
Yes. Others knew about. Others wanted it.

The Mic
So where is she?

The Indian
She has the gold. Where she is, who knows.

The Mic
She took the gold? All of it?

The Indian
She left me with a bag. A very small bag. And left me there hoping to get it.

The Mic
Damn. Well,w e always said she was smarter than all of us.

The Indian
I just didn't think she was so cold.

The Mic
Its the species. They have that undying will to survive and keep their species going.

The Indian
Whereas we just go along until something stops us.

The Mic
Gold huh?

The Indian
A lot of it. And why Am I here?

The Mic

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Unofficial Brother's Bloom Poster

Louisiana Film Production Update 4.13.09

Most of the info comes from Solomon Street Films and the Louisiana Film Website. Some info comes from Production Weekly. And some is just from general reading and gossip.

New Orleans

"The Gatekeeper"
Horror/Comedy Feature
Hindsight Pictures
John Francis Daley, Matt O'Leary, Ron Perlman
Office opens in mid-may
Line Producer: Oak Porcelli
Shoots July 6th for 6 weeks
send resumes to gatekeepermovie@yahoo.com

Period Feature
4001 Division Street
Metairie, LA 70002
OFFICE - 504-324-1755
Rankin Hickman-Prod Supervisor
Yari Schutzer-UPM

“The Expendables”
Action Feature
Directed by Sylvestor Stallone w/Jet Li, Mickey Rourke!!!
Nu Image/Millennium
600 Edwards Ave
Harahan, LA 70123
Josh Throne, UPM
Shoots April 13
504.267.9000 - ph
504.267.9001 - fax
Shoots April 20th - June 15th
Resumes: theexpendablesmovie@gmail.com

“Dead of Night”
Horror Feature
Hyde Park Entertainment
600 Edwards Ave
Harahan, LA 70123
504.267.9050 - ph
504.267.9051 - f
UPM: changed again! ???
POC: Kathy Chambliss
Shoots April 2 - May 28th
Resumes: deadofnightcrewresumes@gmail.com

"Jonah Hex"
Action Feature
Warner Bros.
Josh Brolin as the Comic Book Hero. BIG project.
Riverboat Productions
1231 Prytania St. , 4th Fl
NOLA 70130
504-552-4414 o
504-680-2820 f
Producer: Richard Middleton
POC: Tony Rossi
Shoots April 13th - June 17th
Resumes: jonahhexnola@gmail.com

“Imagination Movers”
Kids TV Series
Back for Season 2
800 Distributors Row
Harahan, LA 70123
Kati Johnston, UPM
POC - Justin Groetsch
Resumes/Inquiries: imnola504@gmail.com
Shoots Mar 30th - Sept 17th



"The Midgard Entertainment and Red Pictures feature film Punishment is in pre-production in Hammond with shooting scheduled from June 1 through July 1. Resumes are being accepted by e-mail at punishment@rocketmail.com."

Louisiana Rumours/Upcoming films

No word yet on when or where on these projects; but they have at least had something published about them.

"The producers of Slither, Dawn of the Dead, and Hostel are coming to Louisiana to make their next film." Production Weekly simply had it listed for Louisiana, so who knows where it is going.

I Walked With a Zombie
Production Weekly had it listed for Late Spring in New Orleans. My best guess is maybe early summer. Remake of an old RKO Val Lewton film.

Satchmo Projects

Forrest Whitaker was talking about directing a Satchmo biopic film this Summer in New Orleans last Fall/Winter. There was also talk of Roc Dutton doing an Armstrong bio project for HBO around the same time last year.

Hopefully we will know more by the end of the summer or early fall whether the series gets picked up.

Late Summer/Fall?

Talk of two studio flicks coming either late Summer or Fall. One supposedly with a huge budget. But have seen nothing confirmed on either project yet. But keep you ears open and let James Roque at Solomon Street Films know if you have any info on upcoming projects.

* * *

Things are slow all over right now. So it is important for you to contact your state representative and senator and let them know how the tax credits need to be left at at least 30%. We are losing projects to Georgia and elsewhere. So get friends and family involved as well.

Here is a sample letter Kristin Lekki put together (with some changes from me):

Jane Doe
123 Something St.
New Orleans, La. 70123

Dear Rep. John Doe,

I am writing to you personally in hopes that you will support the extension of our state’s tax credits to the film and television industry. I have been working on movies and television shows for over five years, and have witnessed the massive increase in jobs available since the Motion Picture Tax Incentive Act was passed. Other states like New Mexico and Michigan have passed similar measures, so reducing our inducements to the industry could be catastrophic to the local workforce.
The jobs created in this industry are high paying with health and pension benefits-very hard to come by in this state even prior to the current economic slowdown. How many other industries can say their entry level, lowest paying position pays $125 a day?
After Katrina, the film industry took me all over the country: D.C., Connecticut, California but the Tax Incentive Act made it worth while for me to move back to the city and state that I love.
Please support the extension of the Motion Picture Tax Incentive Act.

Best Regards,

Jane Doe



Books in 2009

Prince of Thieves
Finn McCool's Football Club
Fever Pitch
How Soccer Explains the World

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Leverage Writer's Room Poster

From CHUD: So You Want to be a Film Critic

Great piece by Devin Faraci:

Almost every week I get an email from someone either asking me how to become a film critic or attempting to get me to look at reviews they've written. There's a whole group of people out there who seem to be very interested in picking this up as a career, so I've decided I should lay out some basic tips for anybody thinking about getting into film criticism.

Tip #1: Don't.

Well, unless you're rich or have an aversion to money. These are not great times for professional film critics as newspapers lay them off in droves and as the internet becomes choked with lots of people willing to do the gig for free. There are some amazing writers out there barely scraping by, and I think that it's only going to get worse. It gets tougher and tougher by the day.

You're still here? Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you. Your doom is your own.

Tip #2: Love movies.

This seems obvious, but it's not. There are a number of people out there reviewing films who either seem to hate movies or only like very specific subsects of cinema. Unless you're walking in the door looking to be a niche reviewer only - if your whole thing is going to be reviewing giant monster movies who cares if you like period dramas, I suppose - you should love movies as an artform. Not as a way to pass the time, not as spectacles that are kewl and awesome, but as an artistic medium of communication. You should be just as excited to see a tiny indie as you are to see a major blockbuster. You should be as open to a romance or a musical as you are to a science fiction movie. Your drive should be about movies, not about genres.

Tip #3: Know movies.

Enthusiasm will only get you so far. Your job as a film critic is multi-layered, but one of the most important is being a contextualizer. That means you should understand how movies are made, where a movie fits into the careers of the people who made it and where it further fits into the history of movies as a whole. You don't have to be a film scholar - God knows I'm not - but if Star Wars is the oldest movie you've seen, you need to do some work. You should be familiar with the classics - start with the AFI 100, even though the list is highly suspect - and you should also be familiar with the great talents in history. Is there a genre you're not that keen on? Find out what the best examples of it are and start there.

It's hard to underestimate how important this is. There's been a wave of anti-elitist feelings when it comes to film critics the last couple of years; whatever the root cause of this wave, it's stupid. I don't want to read the movie opinions of people who know nothing about movies. If I wanted that I would ask the soccer mom in the SUV or the Chinese food delivery boy. When I want to buy a new computer, I don't hunt out the reviews of average slobs, I try to find people with some knowledge of the subject. I look for authority. Now, a movie review is different from a computer review - for one thing, if you think a movie review is a consumer recommendation (ie, 'This movie is the best bet for your Friday money!') get the fuck out of this article right now. That's the lowest form of movie reviewing, and in fact I'm kind of loathe to even call it reviewing. But the fact remains that when I'm reading opinions on something I want the best informed opinion possible. Dumb opinions are useless.

Tip #4: Know how to write.

Put away your exclamation points. Curb the use of bodily fluid metaphors to explain how much you enjoyed a film. Learn how to communicate using the written word.

You don't have to be writing in the best Queen's English, and you don't have to be delivering the kind of prose that they'll be teaching in high schools fifty years from now. But you do have to be able to get across what you're trying to say succinctly and well, and you should be doing it in a way that is enjoyable to read. Yes, film reviews should be their own little pieces of art. They should be entertaining in their own right. I have books of film reviews not because I might need to suddenly find out what Pauline Kael thought of Giant, but because I really like the way she communicated what she thought of Giant. I read it for the writing.

You should, however, have enough facility with the English language that you don't make a jackass out of yourself. People will judge you based on the way you write, and if you're dropping 'should of' instead of 'should have' all the time, people are going to think you're a moron. And you'll end up with a readership of people who are even dumber than you appear to be.

Tip #5: Know movies.

Seriously, it's important enough to list twice. If you're making a top ten list and you find all the films on that list came out in the 80s or later, stop being a film critic and commence watching lots and lots of movies. If you don't know what the 180 degree rule is, stop being a film critic and buy some books on filmmaking. If you think you know enough about films and filmmaking, stop being a film critic and get some humility and sense.

Tip #6: Be thoughtful.

The internet's immediacy hurts film criticism. Too many people rush home (or to the nearest wifi spot) after a screening in order to be the first to have a review up. A thoughtful, intelligent person understands that in many cases - possibly even most cases - it's preferable to have a couple of hours or days to chew a movie over. You need to go over it in your head. You need a little while to let the initial 'I just had a good time in the theater' shine wear off (and this sounds cynical, but it's true. Again, you're not a consumer reporter, so you're not writing reviews to tell people they'll have two fun hours in the theater that they will immediately forget. You're trying to be at least a little bit intelligent in how you approach reviewing). You owe it to your readers to have something interesting to say, not just to gush over a movie. Give them something to think about, a new angle to consider, or even a little bit of trivia that puts the movie in a new perspective. Anything to justify the fact that they're reading your words and not simply skipping to your numerical grade at the end.

Being first isn't important in the long run. Being best is.

Tip #7: Be honest.

As a film critic all you have is your opinion. That's why it's so important to have it be educated (#s 3 and 5), and that's why it's so important to communicate it clearly (#4). And that's why it's so important that your readers can trust it. They don't have to agree with it, they just have to know that you really mean it. If your readers know they every review you write is entertaining to read, backed up with real knowledge and most importantly honest, they'll keep reading you. It's when they begin to suspect that you're full of shit that you're in the biggest trouble.

That means if you hated a movie that you know all of your readers will like you have to be honest about it. If you liked a movie that you think will be unpopular, you have to be honest about it. Use our hard-earned knowledge of movies and your well practiced skills as a writer to create a readable, cogent argument, but it has to be an honest one. You can't write something to appease the readers, and you can't write something to appease filmmakers or studios. That's the real trap: you come to like a certain filmmaker (either professionally or personally, as can happen when you've been doing this long enough with enough success) and you're afraid to say something bad about their new film. Lying about it won't help anybody. It won't help the filmmaker get any better next time and it won't help your readers trust you. They'll see through it in a heartbeat.

And don't be afraid to be wrong! Are you the only person who loved or hated a specific movie? Don't let that turn you into a second guesser. As long as your argument is presented well (ie, not simply saying 'This was boring!' or 'This sucked!'), make your argument. Maybe you'll change your mind later - we're all human and we grow, so God knows I have early reviews where the opinions on display make me wince - but this is how you feel now. This is part of being honest. Again, as long as you can back up your opinions with thought, knowledge and good writing, make your case.



Someday We'll Go All The Way - Eddie Vedder

Yes, I am a Cardinals fan for life, but God I love this song for Opening Day:

“Someday We’ll Go All the Way”

Yeah, don’t let them say that it’s just a game.
Well, I’ve seen other teams, and it is never the same.
When you go to Chicago, you’re blessed and you’re healed,
The first time you walk into Wrigley Field.

Heroes with pinstripes and heroes in blue,
Give us the chance to feel like heroes do.
Whether we’ll win and if we should lose,
We know someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.

We are one with the Cubs,
With the Cubs we’re in love.
Hold our heads tall as the underdogs.
We are not fairweather, but farweather fans.
Like brothers in arms, in the streets and the stands.
There’s magic in the ivy and the old scoreboard.
The same one I stared at as a kid keeping score.
In a world full of greed, we could never want more.
And someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.
Well, someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.

And here’s to the men and the legends we’ve known.
Giving us faith and giving us hope.
United we stand, and united we’ll fall,
Down to our knees the day we win it all.
Yeah Ernie Banks said, “Oh, let’s play two!”
I think he meant two hundred years.
Playing at Wrigley, our diamond, our jewel.
The home of our joy and our fears.
Keeping traditions, and wishes anew,
The place where our grandfathers’ fathers they grew.
The spiritual feeling if I ever knew.
And when the day comes for that last winning run,
And I’m crying and covered with beer.
I look to the sky and know I was right today.
Someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.
Yeah, someday we’ll go all the way.

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Books in 2009

Prince of Thieves
Finn McCool's Football Club
Fever Pitch

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Yuri Gagarin Quote

"Circling the Earth in my orbital spaceship I marveled at the beauty of our planet. People of the world, let us safeguard and enhance this beauty — not destroy it!"

Yuri Gagarin, 1st person in space



Jonah Hex Set Pics from the T-P

GEORGE BERKE / THE TIMES-PICAYUNE Set painters Brad Benischeck, right, and Evan Fagot prepair a set in City Park north of the traffic circle along Harrison Avenue Wednesday, April 1, 2009, to be used in the filming of the movie "Jonah Hex" being built

GEORGE BERKE / THE TIMES-PICAYUNE Set painters Brad Benischeck, on ladder, and Evan Fagot, right, prepair a set in City Park north of the traffic circle along Harrison Avenue Wednesday, April 1, 2009, to be used in the filming of the movie "Jonah Hex" being built

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The Soccer Project

Two players. 25 countries. One game...

Four soccer-playing filmmakers abandon jobs, renew passports, trade novels for LONELY PLANETS and travel around the world in search of pick-up soccer.

The official site.

Their blog.

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Hexed #3

Planetary 27